During last week’s proofreading with wasserface
, she said something along the lines of, “You’re coughing.* Everyone in the office is coughing. It’s strep season. I just had strep last week. Do you think it’s strep? I hope it isn’t strep. STREP STREP STREP STREP STREP.” And then I stabbed her in the throat with a blue pencil.**
So of course, I’ve spent today chugging a mix of hot water, cayenne pepper sauce, honey, lemon juice, and apple cider vinegar (plus the occasional shot of Robitussin) in an attempt to dissolve whatever crud is currently massing in the back of my throat.* I wasn’t. I had just sipped some water and cleared my throat.
** No I didn’t. But I’m pretty sure if I had, no one would have ratted me out, and the guy in the nearest cubicle would have whistled while he helped me hide the body.